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Kester, Vaughan, 1869-1911

"The Prodigal Judge"

Let's get acquainted
quick. I'm here fo' to co'te yo' Polly. I seen her on the road
a spell back and I couldn't be better suited.'
"He says, 'You had ought to be kivered up in salt, young man,
else yo'll spile in this climate.'
"I says, 'I'll keep in any climate.'
'He says, 'Polly ain't givin' her thoughts much to marryin',
she's busy keepin' house fo' her pore old father.'
"I says, 'I've come here special fo' to arouse them thoughts you
mention. If I seem slow '
"He says, 'You don't. If this is yo' idea of bein' slow, I'd
wish to avoid you when you was in a hurry.'
"I says, 'Put in yo' spare moments thinkin' up a suitable
blessin' fo' us.'
"He says, 'You'll have yo' hands full. There's a number of young
fellows hereabouts that you don't lay it over none in p'int of
freshness or looks.'
"I says, 'Does she encourage any of 'em?'
"He says, 'Nope, she don't. Ain't I been tellin' you she's
givin' her mind to keepin' house fo' her pore old father?'
"I says, 'If she don't encourage 'em none, she shore must
disencourage 'em. I 'low she gets my help in that.'
"He says, 'They'll run you so far into the mountings, Mr.
Cavendish, you'll never be heard tell of again in these parts.'
"I says, 'I'll bust the heads offen these here galoots if they
try that!'
"He asks, grinnin', 'Have you arranged how yo' remains are to be
sent back to yo' folks?'
"I says, 'I'm an orphan man of title, a peer of England, and you
can leave me lay if it cones to that.


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