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Haliburton, Thomas Chandler, 1796-1865

"The Clockmaker"

'
'Oh my Gor,' said he, 'oh! massa Jim Munroe he hang himself, on the
ash saplin' under Miss Sally's window--oh my Gor!' That shot was a
settler, it struck poor Sall right atwixt wind and water; she gave a
lurch ahead, then healed over and sunk right down in another faintin'
fit; and Juno, old Snow's wife, carried her off and laid her down on
the bed. Poor thing, she felt ugly enough, I do suppose.
"Well, father, I thought he'd a-fainted too, he was so struck up all
of a heap, he was completely bung fungered. 'Dear, dear,' said he, 'I
didn't think it would come to pass so soon, but I knew it would come;
I foretold it; says I, the last time I seed him, "Jim," says I, "mind
what I say, YOU'LL SWING FOR IT YET." Give me the sword I wore when
I was at Bunker's hill--maybe there is life yet--I'll cut him down.'
The lantern was soon made ready, and out we went to the ash saplin'.
'Cut me down, Sam, that's a good fellow,' said Jim, 'all the blood
in my body has swashed into my head, and's a-runnin' out o' my nose,
I'm e'enamost smothered, be quick for heaven's sake.' 'The Lord be
praised,' said father, 'the poor sinner is not quite dead yet. Why,
as I'm alive--well if that don't beat all natur'! Why he has hanged
himself by one leg, and's a-swingin' like a rabbit upside down,
that's a fact. Why, if he ain't snared, Sam; he is properly wired I
declare--I vow this is some o' your doin's, Sam--well it was a clever
scheme too, but a little grain too dangerous, I guess.


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