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Haliburton, Thomas Chandler, 1796-1865

"The Clockmaker"

Then I jumps
up on eend, and says I 'Go ahead Clay,' and the old horse he sets off
a head, so I knew I had him when I wanted him. Then says I, 'I hope
you are satisfied now, Mr. Bradley, with that 'ere ungenteel fall you
gin me.' Well, he makes a blow at me, and I dodged it. 'Now,' says I,
'you'll be sorry for this, I tell you; I won't be treated this way
for nothin', I'll go right off and swear my life agin you, I'm most
afeerd you'll murder me.' Well, he strikes at me agin, thinkin' he
had a genuine soft horn to deal with, and hits me in the shoulder.
'Now,' says I, I won't stand here to be lathered like a dog all day
long this fashion, it ain't pretty at all; I guess I'll give you a
chase for it.' Off I sets arter my horse like mad, and he arter me (I
did that to get clear of the crowd, so that I might have fair play at
him). Well, I soon found I had the heels of him, and could play him
as I liked. Then I slackened up a little, and when he came close up
to me, so as nearly to lay his hand upon me, I squatted right whap
down, all short, and he pitched over me near about a rod or so, I
guess, on his head, and ploughed up the ground with his nose, the
matter of a foot or two. If he didn't polish up the coulter, and both
mould boards of his face, it's a pity. 'Now,' says I, 'you had better
lay where you be and let me go, for I am proper tired; I blow like a
horse that's got the heaves; and besides,' says I, 'I guess you had
better wash your face, for I am most a feared you hurt yourself.


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