' Then all,
especially those whom I had led there, cursed me. Fallen spirits
gloried over me. The evil passions of all the lost were let loose on
me. My own wicked feelings were kindled into a flame by the divine
wrath. Now I understood that scripture, 'They have no rest day nor
night.' My ears, that had taken pleasure in evil conversation, were
filled with revilings. My tongue, which had set on fire the course
of nature, now itself set on fire of hell, I gnawed for pain. I
looked up to beg a drop of water; but instead of it came the word,
'Daughter, remember.' As I looked up, I got a glimpse of one of my
companions in Abraham's bosom. Once we were together pointed to
Jesus. Now the impassable gulf was between us. Hope now fled
forever, and that word, 'Remember,' brought every moment of my life
before me in characters of flaming fire. Gladly would I have
exchanged this agony for the pangs of death endured a thousand times
over, or for all the sufferings of earth till the final
conflagration. I cursed my soul, weeping without a tear. Why were my
associates, once, like me, children of wrath, now in heaven, while I
was shut out? Ah, they listened to Jesus, while I rejected him, and
to enjoy a momentary pleasure plunged into all this anguish.
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