I shall
mortify him; but that is a trifle compared with actual misery. I shall
grieve my parents; but, were they truly such, would they not grieve
still more that I must reject the life of mutual love? I have already
sacrificed enough; shall I sacrifice the happiness of one I could
really bless for those who do not know one native heart-beat of my
life?"
V---- kissed her hand.
"And yet," said she, sighing, "it does not always look so. We must, in
that case, leave the world; it will not tolerate us. Can I make V----
happy in solitude? And what would Almeria think? Often it seems that
she would feel that now I do love, and could make a green spot in the
desert of life over which she mourned, she would rejoice to have me do
so. Then, again, something whispers she might have objections to make;
and I wish--O, I long to know them! For I feel that this is the great
crisis of my life, and that if I do not act wisely, now that I have
thought and felt, it will be unpardonable. In my first error I was
ignorant what I wished, but now I know, and ought not to be weak or
deluded."
I said, "Have you no religious scruples? Do you never think of your
vow as sacred?"
"Never!" she replied, with flashing eyes.
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