[Footnote: "American Ideals," p.
93.]
Another story also relates to the "Colonel." He was presiding at a
committee meeting, in an extremely dignified and severe state of
mind. He usually came to the meetings in this mood, as a result of
having visited the bar, and taken a number of rye whiskies. The
meeting was addressed by "a great, burly man ... who bellowed as
if he had been a bull of Bashan."
The Colonel, by this time pretty far gone, eyed him malevolently,
swaying to and fro in his chair. However, the first effect of the
fellow's oratory was soothing rather than otherwise, and produced
the unexpected result of sending the chairman fast asleep bolt
upright. But in a minute or two, as the man warmed up to his work,
he gave a peculiar resonant howl which waked the Colonel up. The
latter came to himself with a jerk, looked fixedly at the
audience, caught sight of the speaker, remembered having seen him
before, forgot that he had been asleep, and concluded that it must
have been on some previous day. Hammer, hammer, hammer, went the
gavel, and--
"I've seen you before, sir!"
"You have not," said the man.
"Don't tell me I lie, sir!" responded the Colonel, with sudden
ferocity. "You've addressed this committee on a previous day!"
"I've never--" began the man; but the Colonel broke in again:
"Sit down, sir! The dignity of the chair must be preserved! No man
shall speak to this committee twice.
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