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Various

"Good Stories from the Ladies' Home Journal"

"
Scarcely had he finished speaking when the Princess Bismarck appeared
at the door. "My dear," she said to her husband, "you must come at
once and take your medicine; you should have taken it an hour ago."

_Not for Him_
A quiet and retiring citizen occupied a seat near the door of a
crowded car when a masterful stout woman entered.
Having no newspaper behind which to hide he was fixed and subjugated
by her glittering eye. He rose and offered his place to her.
Seating herself--without thanking him--she exclaimed in tones that
reached to the farthest end of the car:
"What do you want to stand up there for? Come here and sit on my
lap."
"Madam," gasped the man, as his face became scarlet. "I beg your
pardon, I--I----"
"What do you mean?" shrieked the woman. "You know very well I was
speaking to my niece there behind you."

_Such a Pleasant Room_
"It ain't ev'rybody I'd put to sleep in this room," said old Mrs.
Jinks to the fastidious and extremely nervous young minister who was
spending a night at her house.
"This here room is full of sacred associations to me," she went on,
as she bustled around opening shutters and arranging the curtains.


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