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Various

"Good Stories from the Ladies' Home Journal"

When the flow of language was exhausted he
said;
"Are you troo?"
"Yes."
"You ain't got nuffin' more to say?"
"No."
"Well, all dem tings what you called me you is."

_What Would Happen_
A woman agitator, holding forth on the platform and presenting the
greatness other sex, cried out: "Take away woman and what would
follow?"
And from the audience came a clear, male voice: "We would."

_Couldn't Fool Him That Far_
Years ago, when telephones were still a novelty, a farmer came to town
one day and called on a lawyer friend of his whom he supplied with
butter, and who had had a telephone recently put in his office.
"Need any butter this morning?" asked the farmer.
"Well, I don't know," answered the lawyer. "Wait a minute. I'll ask
my wife about it."
After speaking through the 'phone he went on; "No; my wife says no."
The farmer's face was a study for a moment. Then he broke out with:
"Look-a-here, Mr. Lawyer, I may be a 'Rube' and have my whiskers full
of hay and hayseed, but I'm not such a big fool as to believe that
your wife is in that box!"

_And They Wondered_!
At a banquet held in a room, the walls of which were adorned with many
beautiful paintings, a well-known college president was called upon to
respond to a toast.


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