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Various

"Good Stories from the Ladies' Home Journal"

"
"That isn't it. Sister saw him fall--all the way. I never saw
nuffen."

_Denied the Only Shade_
It was a broiling hot day in the park, and those walking therein were
well-nigh exhausted, when a very stout old lady came bustling along
one of the paths, closely followed by a rough-looking tramp.
Twice she commanded him to leave her, but Still he followed just
behind.
At last the old lady, quite disgusted, turned angrily around and said:
"Look here, my man, if you don't go away I shall call a policeman."
The poor fellow looked up at her with a tear in his eye, and then
remarked:
"For goodness' sake, mum, have mercy and don't call a policeman, for
ye're the on'y shady spot in the park."

_Wanted to Make Her Happy_
In one of the many hospitals in the South a bright, busy-looking and
duty-loving woman hustled up to one of the wounded soldiers who lay
gazing at the ceiling above his cot. "Can't I do something for you,
my poor fellow?" said the woman imploringly. The "poor fellow" looked
up languidly. The only things he really wanted just at that time were
his discharge and a box of cigars.


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