When he was almost asleep he could hear her still scolding him
unmercifully. He dropped off to sleep and awoke after a couple of
hours, only to hear his wife remark:
"I hope all the women don't have to put up with such conduct as this."
"Annie," said Jones, "are you talking again or yet?"
_The Greater Calamity_
Two or three urchins were running down a long and very steep flight of
steps, when the foremost stumbled and fell headlong twenty to thirty
feet, and was only stopped near the bottom by doubling backward around
the newel-post. It looked as though his back was broken, and that he
was a dead small boy, but he gathered himself up, thrust his hands
anxiously in his trousers' pockets, and ejaculated;
"B' gosh, I b'l'eve I lost a cent."
_Her First Railroad Ride_
An old lady in Missouri took her first railroad trip last week, says
"The Butter Democrat." She noticed the bell-cord overhead, and,
turning to a boy, she said: "Sonny, what's that for?" "That, marm,"
he said, with a mischievous twinkle in his eye, "is to ring the bell
when you want something to eat.
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