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Oemler, Marie Conway, 1879-1932

"A Woman Named Smith"

Alicia swooped upon a pair of china dogs with mauve
eyes and black spots and sloppy red tongues, on a what-not in a
corner. She said she had been aching for a china dog ever since she
was born.
"Oh, Sophy!" cried she, dancing, "wasn't it heavenly of that old
soul to die and leave you two whole china dogs! I wouldn't want
sure-enough dogs that looked like these, but as china dogs they're
perfect! And cast your eyes about you, Sophy! Have you ever in all
your life seen a house that needed so much done to it as this house
does?
"'If seven maids with seven mops,
Swept it for half a year,
Do you suppose,' the Walrus said,
'That that would make it clear?'
'I doubt it,' said the Carpenter,
'And--'
"Sophy! I shall clean some of these windows myself. Did you know
that Queen Victoria, when she was a child, had the same virtuous
inclination? Well, she had, and you see how she turned out!"
"I don't believe it!"
"Don't be skeptical!--Look at that pink mustache-cup over there on
that little table! Who do you suppose had a mustache and drank out
of that cup? It couldn't have been Sophronisba herself? _I_
insist that it was a black-mustached Confederate with a red sash
around his waist.


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