O.: "On April 1st, 1920, the
following relinquishes his appointment
(Remaining, however,
Yours always), HENRY."
* * * * *
ANOTHER IMPENDING APOLOGY.
"MOTHERS' UNION.-- ... A helpful discussion followed on 'How
to Deal with Unworthy Members.' There were about 50
present."--_Parish Magazine_.
* * * * *
[Illustration: _Old Lady_. "WILL YOU PLEASE PUT ME DOWN AT THE SAME
PLACE AS YOU DID LAST FRIDAY WEEK?"]
* * * * *
THE PRACTICE OF THE CREWS.
(_Ballad after C.S.C._)
The reporter aired his aquatic lore
(_Popply water in Corney Reach_,)
A thing he had yearly essayed before;
And a rowing jargon obscured his speech.
The coach he coached with a megaphone
(_Crabtree, Craven and Chiswick Eyot_)
Till the crew were prone to emit a groan,
And the Cox said nothing but "Bow, you're late."
The Stroke he quickened to thirty-four
(_In the first half-minute struck seventeen_)
Some clocks returned it a trifle more,
Which wasn't so good as it might have been.
The towpath critic he shook his head
(_Thornycroft's, where they began to row_):
"Hung over the stretcher" was what he said,
And "missed the beginning," and "hands too slow."
The towpath critic, whoe'er he be
(_A tug and some barges blocked the way_),
For thirty odd years, it seems to me,
Has never found anything else to say.
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