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Haliburton, Thomas Chandler, 1796-1865

"Nature and Human Nature"

Sorrow,' said she, 'is I showin' of my ankles,' said
she, 'rollin' about so like mad?'
"'Little bit,' sais I, 'Missus.'
"'Den put dat scarf ober my feet agin. What on earth does you mean,
Sorrow, bout not sleepin' too close to de Yankees?'
"'Missus,' sais I, 'does you recollect de day when Zeno was drownded
off de raft? Well, dat day Plutarch was lowed to visit next
plantation, and dey bring him home mazin' drunk--stupid as owl, his
mout open and he couldn't speak, and his eye open and he couldn't see.
Well, as you don't low niggar to be flogged, Aunt Phillissy Ann and I
lay our heads together, and we tought we'd punish him; so we ondressed
him, and put him into same bed wid poor Zeno, and when he woke up in
de mornin' he was most frighten to def, and had de cold chills on him,
and his eye stared out ob his head, and his teeth chattered like
monkeys. He was so frighten, we had to burn lights for a week--he
tought after dat he saw Zeno in bed wid him all de time. It's werry
dangerous, Missus, to sleep near cold people like Yankees and dead
niggars.'
"'Sorrow, you is a knave I believe,' she said.
"'Knave, knave, Missus,' I sais, 'I don't know dat word.'
"'Sorrow,' said she, 'I is a goin' to take you wid me.'
"'Tank you, Missus,' said I, 'oh! bless your heart, Missus.'"
"Sorrow," said I, sternly, "do you ever intend to tell us how you are
going to cook them clams, or do you mean to chat all day?"
"Jist in one minute, Massa, I is jist comin' to it," said he.


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