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Haliburton, Thomas Chandler, 1796-1865

"Nature and Human Nature"


It's the easiest thing in the world to teach now-a-days.'
"'But suppose you get beyond the rudiments?'
"'Oh, they never remain long enough to do that. They are brought out
before then. They go to Saratoga first in summer, and then to
Washington in winter, and are married right off after that. The
domestic, seclusive, and exclusive system, is found most conducive to
a high state of refinement and delicacy. I am doing well, Sam,' said
she, drawing nearer, and looking confidential in my face. 'I own all
this college, and all the lands about, and have laid up forty thousand
dollars besides;' and she nodded her head at me, and looked earnest,
as much as to say, 'That is a fact, ain't it grand?'
"'The devil you have,' said I, as if I had taken the bait. 'I had a
proposal to make.'
"'Oh,' said she, and she coloured up all over, and got up and said,
'Sam, won't you have a glass of wine, dear?' She intended it to give
me courage to speak out, and she went to a closet, and brought out a
tray with a decanter, and two or three glasses on it, and some frosted
plum-cake. 'Try that cake, dear,' she said, 'I made it myself, and
your dear old mother taught me how to do it;' and then she laid back
her head, and larfed like anything. 'Sam,' said she, 'what a memory
you have; I had forgot all about the cherry-tree, I don't recollect a
word of it.'
"'And the calf?' said I.


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