Water is our drink, and it was made
for us to take when we were dry, and be thankful. After I first saw
one of these drops, like an old cheese chock full of livin' things, I
couldn't drink nothing but pure gin or brandy for a week. I was scared
to death. I consaited when I went to bed I could audibly feel these
critters fightin' like Turks and minin' my inerds, and I got narvous
lest my stomach like a citadel might be blowed up and the works
destroyed. It was frightful.
"At last I sot up and said, Sam, where is all your common sense gone?
You used to have a considerable sized phial of it, I hope you ain't
lost the cork and let it all run out. So I put myself in the
witness-stand, and asked myself a few questions.
"'Water was made to drink, warn't it?'
"'That's a fact.'
"'You can't see them critters in it with your naked eye?'
"'I can't see them at all, neither naked or dressed.'
"'Then it warn't intended you should?'
"'Seems as if it wasn't,' sais I.
"'Then drink, and don't be skeered.'
"'I'll be darned if I don't, for who knows them wee-monstrosities
don't help digestion, or feed on human pyson. They warn't put into
Adam's ale for nothin', that's a fact.'
"It seems as if they warn't,' sais I. 'So now I'll go to sleep.'
"Well, puritans' eyes are like them magnifiers; they see the devil in
everything but themselves, where he is plaguy apt to be found by them
that want him; for he feels at home in their company.
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